It's so hard, so hard to hide the unhappiness.

so much has happened recently and it's too much for me to take. i'm just a f-ing useless daughter, and futhermore a useless friend. it's just so hard to hide all the unhappiness. i couldn't do a thing to help at all. i could only cry like nobody's business and try f-ing hard to not let anyone see. i used to cry when i feel like it, i don't care if people caught me crying. but now, i've to hide. i've to hide so much. i've to hide everything. because it doesn't help at all if i cry like an immature child. things would still remain like this, i can't help to change anything at all. their pain wouldn't stop, their unhappiness still exists. school tomorrow? not ready, seriously.

if it wasn't for the damn emo-ing me, things wouldn't be like that. if it wasn't the damn uncaring me, i could have prevented that. f. why don't someone just take a dagger and stab me to death. eh wait no, i'll implicate you. maybe you might be sued for murder. furthermore, i'd cause MORE f-ing pain for them. f, couldn't even die if i feel like it.